Relationships

5 Keys to a Great Relationship

5 Keys to a Great Relationship

By on Dec 22, 2010 in Relationships | 0 comments

Guest post by Caitriona Reed I’m very happy that Caitriona has agreed to share this post with The Liberated Life Project. As a woman of transsexual experience who took a journey that involved recreating her public persona, Caitriona Reed is a great model of living a liberated life. I’ve known Caitriona since 1996, when we met at Plum Village, the spiritual community in the South of France founded by Buddhist teacher Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh (also known as Thây). At that time, Caitriona was Christopher, and a Dharma (Buddhist) teacher ordained by Thây. During that trip I also met Michele Benzamin-Miki, who has been Caitriona’s life partner throughout this extraordinary transition. Caitriona has more than 20 years experience as a consultant, public speaker, workshop leader, and facilitator of personal and organizational change. She is also co-founder of Manzanita Village Retreat Center, a retreat in the mountains of Southern California. ______________________________ “Love does not consist of two people gazing intently into each others’ eyes, but by their looking out in the same direction from a shared vantage point.” —Antoine de Saint Exupéry Many otherwise extremely successful people have reflected that without the intimacy of a sustained and loving relationship, all their accomplishments mean very little. Without someone to share their success, their life remains empty and unfulfilled. As humans we are wired for connection with others. We are social animals. We have evolved our primate sensibilities and perceptions over millions of years. Our skills for communicating and interacting with other people embody the essence of who we are. Have you noticed that those skills seem to grow stronger when you are in deepening proximity to others, or more precisely to an-other, with whom you are coming into increasing degrees of intimacy and loving ease? Without the sort of intimacy that we experience with a mate, a companion, or a lover, we may be missing an essential catalyst, something that is uniquely capable of moving us towards greater fulfillment.  I do not just mean sexual intimacy, but something more encompassing – that may or may not include sex. There is much to be said for solitude. We may indeed be wired for that too. Some of us thrive on it. However,...

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Beginnings. . . Relationships

Beginnings. . . Relationships

By on Nov 26, 2010 in Relationships | 3 comments

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. “Pooh!” he whispered. “Yes, Piglet?” “Nothing,” said Piglet, taking Pooh’s paw. “I just wanted to be sure of you.” —A.A. Milne ____________ As I’ve been writing these introduction posts for each category, I’ve kept staring at “Relationships” and finding all kinds of ways to avoid it. I’ve not had an easy time with relationships in my life and by no means do I feel like I’m an expert in this area. In fact, my life has been one long trudge to learn what intimacy really means. An image of a scene from the movie Dr. Zhivago comes to mind, where the good doctor is practically crawling across the plains of Russia in the midst of a huge blizzard… yes, that’s what it’s felt like at times. What does it mean to be “liberated” when it comes to relationships? I believe it means— coming to know ourselves well enough so that our ‘stuff’ doesn’t get projected onto our loved one understanding the beliefs that we’ve inherited about what relationships are supposed to be like – and letting them go so that we can be present for what our relationship is truly like realizing that the most important relationship is the one with ourselves knowing that we are in relationship with the whole world at all times “Relationship” is defined broadly here – it may be with a wife, husband, partner, or lover. But it can also be with our kids, our parents, our best friend, our co-workers, the homeless young man down the street, that beautiful gnarled oak tree in the park. Remember, everything in a liberated life is bigger than it seems. What this is really about is interconnection, that mysterious quality of life in which we are connected to everyone and everything, and at the same time we walk our path alone. The Liberated Life Project will explore these relationship edges…with the intention of building stronger connections to all our beloveds. I’m sure I’ll be learning just as much as you : ) ____________ If you appreciated this article, please consider signing up for a free membership to “Team Liberation” to receive these posts by email, plus other goodies from the...

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